I’d like to relay a little story of the time I had a beer with Kris Kristofferson … before he was famous. It was 1968; I was eighteen years old, and was hitchhiking from Miami to New York. I had gotten off the beaten track, so to speak. I should have stayed on US 301 […]
Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump. I said, “Don’t do it!” He said, “Nobody loves me.” I said, “God loves you. Do you believe in God?” He said, “Yes.” I said, “Are you a Christian or a Jew?” He said, “A Christian.” I said, “Me, too! Protestant or Catholic?” He […]
A man walks into a bar. He’s normal size but has a tiny head, about the size of a small cantaloupe. The bartender gives him his desired drink and leans against the back bar. After a few minutes he says, “I’m sorry, but I just gotta ask. Were you born like that?” “Not at all,” […]
It’s said you have to walk that lonesome valley for yourself. Nobody else can go it for you. I was heading down trail—that long lonesome trail—intent on making my own way. I was once so lonely … I was once without you. I ain’t much for words. I’m just a hired hand, working for wages […]
Hey guys, it’s me, Danny—your favorite dog. I’m hangin’ out just listenin’ to Willie sing a little Kris. My human, Andrew, doesn’t get it. He doesn’t know that Kris and Willie are speaking for God. Have you ever listened to “Sunday Morning Coming Down”? I love to ride in cars, don’t you? Sticking my head […]
Did you all miss me last week? Of course you did. Well, worry not. I’m back from vacation and rarin’ to go. Now on to this week’s adventure. I had a surprise visit today from two old friends who came all the way from Spain just to see me. They claimed they had come to […]
My name is Andrew Joyce, and for those of you who keep up with the adventures of Danny the Dog, I’m his human and he’s my dog. He’s always writing about me, telling you nice people what an idiot I am and that I drink too much. But I want you to know right here […]
I’m in a foul mood today, so this communiqué will be short. It’s been raining for three days and three nights. One more day of this miserable weather and I’m going to have Andrew build us an ark. Well, maybe not, seeing as how we already live on a boat. “We” being myself, Danny the […]
I’ve just been reading a little Billy Shakespeare and listening to Kris Kristofferson. Genius will tell out. What got to me this day was how they both spoke to having nothing. Billy said: “Having nothing, nothing can he lose.” (Henry VI, Part 3) And Kris wrote: “Freedom’s just another word for nothin’ left to lose.” […]
Danny the Dog here with another tale of lust and depravity—oh wait, that’s Andrew’s bailiwick. Andrew, for the few of you who don’t know, is my human. He’s not around at the moment. They opened a new bar in town and Andrew flew down there to give them some business. I’ll probably get a call […]
Andrew Joyce 