An email to Close Friends

Hey guys. What’s happening?

What? You wanna know what I’ve been up to?

I’ve been just sittin’ here … trying to kill myself.

No … no. Don’t get crazy on me.

I’m doing it slowly. It’s more fun that way.

I’ve been trying all my life … to end my life.

I mean, I threw myself into situations that would have got any decent guy killed.

But, me? No fucking way. The bullets just passed me by.

Then I thought drugs would do it. No fucking way, again. After thirty years of that shit, I found myself still here, I said to no one in particular, “What the fuck? Can’t a guy get break. I did OD a few times and spent days in a coma, but I still bounced back. Damn it!

So I left drugs behind.

Now I’m trying alcohol. My liver’s gotta admit defeat at some point.

So enough about me. What have you guys been up to?




28 thoughts on “An email to Close Friends

  1. Dear mr Joyce,
    My best friend was also name Andrew Joyce. Today is the one month anniversary that he passed away, as well as the day before his birthday.
    Andrew died of a drug over dose. I’ve been going through various forms of grief, one more messed up that the last, and it led to a long session of googling his name.
    I found your poems and writings, it’s been a very eerie read. Your words could have been his words if I didn’t know he was dead.
    I don’t know if I want to thank you, doesn’t seem exactly right, but I do want you to know your words helped me today.
    Thank you

    Liked by 2 people

    1. “… but I do want you to know your words helped me today.

      Those few words were probably the nicest thing ever said about my writing. Thank you.

      By the way, my birthday is just one day after your friend’s.


      1. While trying not to cry, I’ve been showing some of Andrew’s other close friends some of the things you wrote here. It’s helped a few of us, as weird as it might sound. Obviously, you didn’t know him, but the Andrew Joyce I knew had a love for words like you do. He also had a lot of pain in his heart and soul.
        I hope you continue writing, I’ll continue reading.

        Thank you again


  2. The world will be a poorer place if you drink yourself to heaven. Moderation!
    PS We got another cat – from the pound, a five month old kitten, born there, who is afraid of his shadow. I’m working on him and lucky for me he loves to be petted.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’ll miss your wonderful posts if you trash your liver, Andrew. Every day, write down one thing you are grateful for. It’s magic.
    What am I doing? Trying to finish my second historical novel, and at the same time market my latest fantasy novel.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m not going anywhere unless I get hit by a bus. Good luck with writing and marketing at the same time. I can either do one … or the other …but not both. Probably because to do both would interfere with my drinking.


  4. Was that a Friday the 13th story? A twinge of worry, but then you are the awesome crazy writer. What am I up to? Trying to do a good job at teaching 50 hours a week and also read / write on my blog. Had a breakthrough idea on my book (love the story, but hate the opener) after reading “Some Writer. The Story of E.B. White.” Gotta to get outside today. Maybe you should follow Tim’s advice!!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Great idea, Andrew. It’s a children’s book, and that can be more difficult to write as every single word is critical. I’ll explain more in my email, after I read Steinbeck’s prologue. Thanks.


  5. Let’s see, I have been trying to learn to mind my own business, not be so quick to reach conclusions and over come fears. Yeah, that would about do it. Also, I have been taking every chance that comes my way to appreciate this life of mine for its beauty. (also, editing a new book) So, we keep on, keeping on and when it is our time, we shall still be keeping on! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. So true … we never stop keeping on. At least not until we reach godhood. Then we start all over again. WHAT A GREAT GAME!!! So much better than sitting there as a god twiddling our thumbs. (Do gods have thumbs?)

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Did you ever replace Danny? If not, go to your shelter and adopt a dog. You’ll both benefit from the love between you. And no, it won’t replace Danny in your heart but here’s always room for one more dog. An old guy I know from the local park had an 11 year old Akita he raised from a puppy, and when it died he was broken hearted. Despite his family’s suggestions he resisted getting another dog and I’d see him wandering around the park, tears in his eyes. Eventually the family got him a rescue Jack Russell terrier and the two of them bonded and are both as happy as ever. Go on, you know you want to!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Tim,
      Thank you for the writing. It was very nice of you to take the time. However, I’d like to explain. Of course, I miss Danny. I miss him every day. But it was his time. He was old, he slept almost 23 hours a day. I didn’t see it at the time, but he had no life. And when it was his time, he just went off died.
      Although I miss him, I do not cry for him. I love (yes, love in the present tense … he still exist, but on another plane) too much to want him back the way he was. I’d give anything to have him back, young and spry. But that’s not the way of the world.
      Thanks again for getting in touch. Please say hello to our mutual friend for me.


  7. Oh, for God’s sake, give it a rest. Haven’t you heard, baby? Only the good die young. So get a grip, Andrew…you’re going to be with us for a long time yet! What have I been up to? Lost at poker tonight. Can’t win ’em all – thanks for asking!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Tina said it best. But I will add, I am only a call away, day or night! Sometimes just talking it out can help and if this is another example of your “truth or fiction”, may I add that your believability is superb!

      Liked by 2 people

  8. So, Andrew, haven’t you tried alcohol before? And you’re still here! Let’s get down to reality. Alcohol’s not going to do it. It’s not a “fun way to go drug.” It’s a depressant! And you’re already depressed. Look at what sad loses you’ve had lately. You’re writing will go to crap along with any sound sleep, being knocked out drunk. Now back to the writing. You’ve got a talent, a gift, and more books to write. Remember, we’re marketing one in November. You want a clear head, my friend, so loose the booze! Now if you just made that post statement for shock value about the alcohol and you really aren’ t trashing your liver, just keep the message for future use if you ever think about it. Phew, all in one breath! 🌺🌷🌸 Christine

    Liked by 2 people

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